So about the emotions.

My birthday is coming in 14 days but hey, who's counting.

Lately I've been buried under piles of shit(studies) I've signed up for with the intention of living my life to "the fullest"(and to avoid SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder which always seems to come to me during the winter like fruitflies to a half-eaten apple). I'm fucking.. frazzled, excuse my French or wait a second, why should I excuse MYSELF, maybe YOU should excuse YOURSELF for your redundant political-correctness. Anywho, I feel emotionally sore(if you haven't noticed it already, you very intuitive individual). And this relationship thing is not working for me. Every time the guy goes out with his friend, I wait for him at home with a scorching Devil's pitch fork and a passive-aggressive, sardonic attitude he can never fully grasp or discern. He says he doesn't mind it and I know he doesn't. But it is taking an emotional toll on me. I feel tormented. It's like having my nail beds stabbed by 4000 needles all at the same time. O.K. I admit. Never been in such situation before, but I imagine it will hurt in some pervertedly miserable way. Which, in that case, I kinda might enjoy?